One of the most common mistakes beginners make when they start learning Polish involves the word “you”.

In English, “you” is universal.

You say “you” to your dog, your best friend, your boss, and the President.

In Polish, it’s not that simple.

Polish has a strict distinction between formal (official) and informal (casual) speech. If you use the casual “you” (ty) with a stranger, a police officer, or an elderly person, it’s considered rude.

To be polite, you must use the honorifics Pan (for men) and Pani (for women).

This can be confusing because it changes the grammar of the sentence.

Keep reading and I’ll explain exactly how to use them so you don’t offend anyone!

Who is Pan and who is Pani?

In simple terms, these words replace “you” in formal situations.

• Pan roughly translates to “Sir” or “Mr.”
• Pani roughly translates to “Madam” or “Ms./Mrs.”

However, we use them much more often than we use “Sir” or “Madam” in English.

You should use Pan or Pani when speaking to:

• Strangers on the street
• Shop assistants, waiters, or clerks
• Anyone older than you (unless they are family)
• Bosses or professional colleagues
• Teachers and professors

You should use the informal Ty (you) when speaking to:

• Children and teenagers
• Close friends
• Family members
• Animals
• Peers (if you are young, e.g., university students talking to other students usually skip the formalities)

The golden grammar rule: The third person

This is the part that tricks most English speakers.

When you use Pan or Pani, you do not use the standard “you” form of the verb.

Instead, you use the third-person singular form (the he/she form).

Think of it like this: In old-fashioned English, a butler might ask a King, “Does His Majesty wish for tea?” rather than “Do you want tea?”

Polish works exactly like that. You are literally asking, “Does Sir have a ticket?” instead of “Do you have a ticket?”

Here is a comparison using the verb mieć (to have).

Here are some dialogue examples to help you hear the difference.

Situation 1: Asking a friend for coffee (Informal)

Situation 2: Asking a customer or a boss for coffee (Formal)

Notice that we used chce (he/she wants) combined with Pan/Pani, rather than chcesz (you want).

Addressing groups (Plural forms)

What happens if you are speaking to more than one person formally? You can’t say “Pan and Pani” over and over again.

We have specific words for groups:

• Państwo: Used for a mixed group of men and women, or a married couple. (This literally means “Lord and Lady” historically, but today it just means “Ladies and Gentlemen”).
• Panie: Used for a group of women only.
• Panowie: Used for a group of men only.

Just like the singular forms, these require the third-person plural verb (the “they” form).

Switching from formal to informal

In Poland, moving from Pan/Pani to Ty is a significant social step. It is called przejście na ty (switching to ‘you’).

You cannot just decide to do this on your own. There is a strict etiquette:

1. The older person initiates it. If you are younger, you must wait for the older person to suggest it.
2. The woman initiates it. In mixed company between peers, the woman usually suggests dropping the formality.
3. The superior initiates it. A boss suggests it to an employee, not the other way around.

The phrase usually used is:

Once you have agreed, you shake hands, say your first names, and from that moment on, you are “buddies” linguistically. You use the Ty form verbs.

Note: If you try to use informal language too early, you might be seen as uneducated or disrespectful. When in doubt, stick to Pan or Pani!

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Polish etiquette relies heavily on knowing who you are talking to.

Here is the quick checklist to remember:

• Use Pan for men and Pani for women in all formal situations.
• Grammar: Always pair these words with the third-person (he/she) verb form, not the second-person (you) form.
• Plurals: Use Państwo for mixed groups.
• Don’t rush: Wait for the other person to invite you to speak informally.

Understanding this distinction will make your trips to Poland much smoother and the locals will appreciate your politeness.